Awaken
by Candice Roe
Summary: Im his harsh reality and hes life's sanity. its not so perfect perfection.


I can hear his brand new running shoes squeak closer to the door and I graciously role my eyes. The woman in front of me leans forwards causing her leather chair to groan like a living person. Like the cow it used to be before it was killed and skin for it to be turned into the perfect chair to fit to the perfect desk in the most perfect shrink office. If you couldn't tell that was sarcasm.

"Tell me where it all began," She said softly. I smile, surprisingly, because it wasn't the beginning it was the stepping point.

. . 

The cuts in my wrist are a reflection on the moving smile on my face. Deeper. As the blade pierces my skin I feel a slight breeze over my body as if for once I have utter calmness in my life. Peace is one thing I pray for, well, more like I wish for. I cannot recall the last time I actually sat down to ask God anything? Who was I to ask the man who could cause a flood or destroy the earth and anything on it for something? No one that's the fuck who. I didn't expect to get anything anyways, because no expectations means no disappointments.

I closed my eyes one more time and I slowly felt the darkness I call reality wash over my soul as I heard Charlie scream out my ironic name I squeezed my eyes again and just hoped they wouldn't open once more but as how great life is I knew I couldn't just sit under the steam in my bathroom for the rest of my life. So I high tailed my ass up, cleaned up the joyous mess I made and got ready for the glorious day ahead of me.

My own room. Some people would enjoy having their own space but I hate it. Well, hate is a very strong word so we could just say I dislike it with a burning passion. Wow now I sound like an erotica book. Don't worry though it won't get to that because I'm not that appealing. Every individual has their own space. I'm not talking about that invisible bubble they talk to you about in pre-school but the space that someone owns and that is rightfully theirs. Beavers have their dams and I have my average sized bedroom. I do not dislike the size or even the shape I only hate that its mine. My own room which reflects myself. I feel like it judges me, it analyzes and reproduces my in a larger and physical form, it mocks me and I can't stand it. I know what you're probably thinking, 'Bella, just change it', Well I can't do that you motherfuckers because then that would be me changing myself. Do you see this mind fuckery that's going on right now! So now that you see things the way I do we can move on from one of the many things that piss me off.

"BELLA!", Charlie screams from downstairs. "Yes shit face", I whispered under my breath and head down the stairs regretting on getting up this morning.

"Are you having breakfast this morning?" he asked without looking up from the paper and sipping his coffee.

"Is that a question or a demand?" I asked while picking my nails. Screw you nervous hereditary traits!

"Well if you say yes, then it's a question but if you say no, then it's a demand," He said with a grin yet still not looking at me.

"Isn't it great to live in a free country," I replied with the most sarcasm known to man. Charlie chuckled and shook his head. I'm glade his learned to deal with me because if he hadn't this conversation could have actually went terribly bad.

Getting into my truck I realized that it would probably start raining as soon as I closed the door and maybe it was the nutritious and delicious breakfast toaster strooddle I had scarfed down this morning but my prediction was right. I took a deep breath in and let it out swiftly. I quickly said,

"Baby please just gets me to hell and back. I know you can do it!" and I was on my way.

So I already thought I was crazy so if I'm wrong about this it confirms it. I was pretty sure there had been this tiny silver Volvo briskly following me from as soon as I left home…. I was sort of scared but at the same time I was debating doing some missing imposable shit just to make my day a little less crapier but as soon as I started whistling that fucker cuts in front of me and forces me to slam on my freaks which resulted in little MS Volvo getting a nice tap on her bumper. It's like I could hear the drivers gasp so I pulled over on the road and awaited their approach.

So hi EVERYON! (Though this maybe no one) This is my first story and I would really like some criticism. I know I'm not the greatest but I'm trying to learn from mistakes! Write and tell me what you think.


End file.
